The great unknown!

36 weeks.

I cannot believe I am possibly less than a month away from coming face to face with my beautiful Squirt!
Whenever I allow myself to think too much about that I get so overwhelmed with excitement that I can hardly think straight!

The one thing I have wanted more than anything else in this world for 2 whole years is finally going to happen!
I will get to hold her in my arms. Hug her. Kiss her. See her face.

And then I start to worry.
Not because I think Im not allowed to be happy.
But because I want her to be here safe and sound and she is so important to me that I just worry.

There was a time when I never thought I would be here.
I never even thought Id see a a baby with a heart beat on an ultrasound. But I did.
I never thought I grow a baby belly, but I have
I never thought Id feel my baby move, but I do, all the time!
And I definately never thought I would be less than a month away from my due date with my precious rainbow.

I was talking to P just now and said to him that it still all seems so surreal.
And I think its because we have no idea when she will choose to arrive.
It could be tomorrow.
It could be in six weeks time.
Or it could be anytime in between.

So I stop myself from getting too excited as it could still be a while away.

And although I am so desperate for her to be here, partly because Im getting uncomfortalbe, but mostly because I am just so looking forward to meeting here, I only want her to come when she is ready.
I dont want her to suffer for my impatience.

I have started drinking my raspberry leaf tea today as technically she would be fine if she was born now.
And because I dont believe it actually brings on labour if your body isnt ready, it just might help labour be shorter.
Which if you ask me cant be a bad thing!

And so all P and I can do is wait.
Wait for Squirt to decide when she wants to arrive!